doing things for no reasons, doing things with no thanks

i;m really tired....non-stop of work coming in, FINALLY...

been spending the whole week running back and forth from class, every morning so that no one can complain that the keybearer is late, every day to classes despite the fact i' already the last guy, one of the compserv guys blow up two coms, and i helped worsen it by blowing the fuse of one of the two AGAIN, teacher gave me that "WTH DID YOU DO?" stare...well, it was a funny experience

now my classmate is complaining i'm a blabbermouth, then he posts at every post i have on the forum as though i did something wrong putting out my view...thinking i'm some anti-slang guy...i'm trying to prevent myself from posting tons of junk about him, but what's the point?...so i ended up not posting anything and letting them post all they want, i'm just going to maintain the website

talking about the website: so far, the only one who has thanked me for making it (at my expense) is Mr. Raja and yee ming & nigel (actually cos they did last years one, but thanks nigel for making the forums, something i can never do). so does the rest of the class even care that it existed?..nooo...only last minute did they start pouring in and then it gets clogged up.......

these things tell me only one thing: i have to work harder.

i have to work harder to prove to chin san that i have information to back my claims
i have to work harder to prove myself as a student
i have to work harder to prove myself as who i am
i have to work harder....i forgot the reason now...

so until then, i'm staying off sheep meat for about a week (thanks to bio disection of sheep heart), i'm going to do work in the cyber ac (despite the fact that it near impossible to do much with a contained area with gun-fire sounds emitting every 5 secs) and i'll stick to either drawing cartoons on my chinese textbook or my red-cross book. and i'll ignore chin san's crazy post.

until then, i'll leave my cutest drawing so far...the crying face of a unknown person(look to the right)

HappyCNY

yesyes, happy CNY...my grand-dad just died, so i really have no celebration

happy birthday michelle, didn't know your bday landed in with the CNY...i thought it was in janurary...oh wait, it is janurary last month..oh...k..my sense of timing is really screwed up now

today would have been rather happy for my classmates...ISO wasn't a murder...Physics probably pushed them to work within a 1hour limit (well its YOUR fault for not finishing it on the deadline that was LAST WEEK)

only four pple studied for the ting xie (chinese spelling)...that is binru, lucas, dsong and me...kind of makes our effort wasted when the teacher just went on with lessons instead of it... the rest of the class must be pretty happy.....i'm not

then after sch, classroom became class room of copiers....WHY IN THE WORLD CAN'T YOU FINISH A SIMPLE BIOLOGY WORKSHEET WITH VERY SIMPLE QUESTIONS AND ONLY COMPREHENSION OF PASSAGE NO RESEARCH REQUIRED AND NOOOOOOOO...YOU HAVE TO "FORGET" TO DO IT AND WAIT TILL WHEN SCH OPENS WHEN YOU HAD 6 DAYS OF CNY AND YOU DIDN'T DO IT....SOMEONE SHOULD JUST TELL OUR BIO TEACHER AND GET YOU KILLED....specifically shawn tan and eugene cheong and chin san...

i know you three don't have lives and morals and dignity...but i have. and i have a serious problem with you three staying behind class and copying: one, cos your copying; two, your burning into someone elses time (mine) and i have a life to live; three you're just idiot for not completing it on your own. no i am not smart, i just work hard, harder than three slackers and rich fags....maybe you all should get SUPER INSULATED BAGS cos sooner or later, i'm gonna throw them out down four floors. ridiculous, i have to be at cyber ac at 3pm(infact 2.55pm) i have the key to the classroom, i have to lock up and return the key, LEAVING THE BACK DOOR OPEN IS NOT AN OPTION, THE ESTATE OFFICE DO CHECK, I KNOW, I HAVE BEEN TOLD OFF FOR LETTING IT OPEN, i cannot lock three of you in and neither can i trust any of you with the key...so next time, you all better copy outside class, before i go mad...and i don't control myself when i'm mad........

cos of three idiots, i am late for cyber ac, the teacher was doing stuff for me/my friend/ the duty guys, i have to rush, i don't eat lunch at all...i'm now home, hungry, furious, and doing the homework dued next week...

kind of sad isn't it? the life of an unknown student who gets scolded just because he wanted to be punctal and all his classmates wanna slack and be late.

this is the story of the most unreasonable things that people miss out. how people doing favours get riddiculed and all efforts to make things better are worsen by those around you. how you can suffer from those who couldn' care less about you, my story.

but there is always something good in something, and i found that something for today that lifted my spirit.

Psalm 15 (yes its in the Bible.) a Psalm by David

1Lord, who shall abide in thy tabernacle? who shall dwell in thy holy hill?
2He that walketh uprightly, and worketh righteousness,and speaketh the truth in hi heart.
3He that backbiteth not with his tongue, nor doesth evil to his neighbour, nor taketh up a reproach against his neighbour.
4In whose eyes a vile person is contermned; but he honoureth them that fear the Lord. He that sweareth to his own hurt, and changeth not.
5He that putteth not out his money to usury, nor taketh reward against the innocent. He that doeth these things shall never be moved.

(i'm sorry about the shakesphere language, it happens the Bible nearest to me was KJV-King James Version, hence the language, but if you are interested, there are online bibles, search them for Psalm 15)

this passage, and a short talk with my dad, brought me back to basics of my beliefs:
no matter how much people oppress you, it is not through their eyes that decides your fate or your reward, it is God who does those decisions.So do what is right in his eye, stray not from his word, and don't worry about how others are nusciences, for with God, even the impossible can be done.